Reports: Trump Is Making Democrats Fat — Literally
Article audio sponsored by The John Birch Society

The train from Loontown has arrived. And there are some interesting passengers onboard who, some observers may argue, just might need a checkup from the neck up.

For example, there’s Barbra Streisand, who says Donald Trump is making her fat. Seriously.

Joining her are fellow Democrats, who say Trump makes them eat and drink too much.

And along for the ride are college kids, who claim the 2016 election gave them Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Streisand: I’m Chubby, And It’s The Donald’s Fault

Streisand told the New York Times that all the stress from living in a country where Donald Trump is the president hasn’t been good for her eating habits. Such is the songbird’s calorie consumption that she might just move to Canada.

A Times reporter goofed and asked the ultimate open-ended question of a leftist who’s as nutty as a Snickers bar.

“How are you feeling these days?” the scrivener asked.

“I want to sleep nights, if we take the House I’ll be able to sleep a little bit better,” Babs replied.

“And if they don’t?” the reporter dutifully followed up.

Warbled Barbra:

Don’t know. I’ve been thinking about, do I want to move to Canada? I don’t know. I’m just so saddened by this thing happening to our country. It’s making me fat. I hear what he said now, and I have to go eat pancakes now, and pancakes are very fattening. We make them with healthy flour, though — almond flour, coconut flour.

That last she actually tweeted the other day: “Donald Trump is making me gain weight. I start the day with liquids, but after the morning news, I eat pancakes smothered in maple syrup!”

barbra tweet

Democrats in general, reports one survey, are doing the same.

The Daily Burn fitness website’s poll, conducted by YouGov, says Democrats are packing on the pounds because Donaldus Magnus has them racing for the fridge.

“Democrats are 50% more likely than Republicans to say they’re eating their feelings as a result of the current political climate,” the pollsters reported in a news release.

Even worse, the Titan of Twitter has driven the lefties to drink: “Political pain points have been driving Dems to drink more, at a 2-to-1 ratio over their counterparts in the GOP,” the release reported. Well, Republicans have less reason to drown their sorrows in drink.

On the brighter side, Democrats are exercising more, the release said, to compensate for the bingeing.

College Kids Have PTSD

Meanwhile, the peer-reviewed Journal of American College Health, reports that college kids just can’t handle politics. The kiddies have PTSD from the election, and unsurprisingly, it’s the worst among Democrats and its coalition of victim groups.

Reported the Journal, “One out of four students met criteria for clinically significant symptoms related to the election…. Sex, political party, religion, and perceived impact of the election on relationships were more useful predictors of stress symptoms than race or social class.”

The conclusions the author drew: “The high level of event-related distress is concerning because elevated symptoms of event-related stress are predictive of future distress and subsequent PTSD diagnoses.”

One of the authors, Melissa J. Hagen, told the Washington Post it’s pretty bad out there on college campuses. Kids are beside themselves with stress, unlike their generational peers taking it easy in the relatively stress-free climes of Iraq and Afghanistan.

Reported the Post:

Her students were “visibly upset,” she recalled in an interview. “Some were even crying.” They told her that they were scared and anxious about policies that had been discussed on the campaign trail, she said, as well as about the elevation of “a candidate who had an audio recording of him describing sexual assault.”

The analysis reveals that women, racial minorities, people from working and lower-middle social classes, Democrats, non-Christians and sexual minorities reported significantly more election-related distress.

Other surveys have found likewise, the Post reported, and that means these kids must be taken seriously, but not because the election itself was the trauma, such as a mass shooting. Problem is, what the election caused:

“But what’s underneath that is helplessness and fear,” she said. “We can think about the election campaign — with discussions of deportation and how women are treated, for instance, and the extreme language used by both candidates — as driving these experiences of intrusion,” Hagan said. “Young people can’t stop thinking about it. It interferes with their concentration.”

No word yet on whether Babs is packing for a move to Canada.

Photo: adamkaz/ E+/Getty Images